Way too many pictures

Apparently this is classic "first child" behavior, but Eric and I have taken hundreds, well probably thousands of pictures of the little man. Every new outfit, facial expression and pretty much new day is captured thanks to the extremely convenient iPhone camera.
So much happens that it's hard to keep up, but for the few of you who are still interested in reading this, be prepared for a crap ton of photos. (It's just easier to caption these days).

Since my last entry, here's what's been happening... In back-assword order.

Harrison turned 3 months on Sunday... He was not amused with photo time, so this is the best I could get. He is now wearing size 2 diapers and getting more hair every day!

The monster got to meet Jeremy and Kayla. We took him to our usual Sunday football restaurant and other than a full wardrobe change, we was his normal awesome self.

After lunch we made it out to pick out our tree.

The mantle is looking good, even with wonky stockings... The tree will be decorated tomorrow evening. This year we will have colored lights per Eric's insistance. I forgot I promised to have a "non-pottery-barn" fun kid tree once we had children... ugh...

You can't tell, but those are Christmas pajamas. And my little guys are just too cute even though they are both on my side of the bed.

Pooped from a very busy weekend and napping like a champ.

Aunt NeNe and Aunt JJ came over while Eric was out of town for dinner and drinks. While Jamie and I were chatting, the monster decided to snooze and took Tiffany down with him.

At about 3am that night, our heater fan decided to completely fail, so l calmly handled the situation- all by myself, thank you very much. All is repaired and working great now, thank goodness.

Being chatty and freaking adorable.

Charleston Turkey day = meeting the Godparents! 

The Dews came over on Friday after Thanksgiving for some monster love. We also made a quick trip to the beach, but during nap time unfortunately.

Blowing spit bubbles at his Great Grandma Ann.

Cuddled up with cousin Morgan.

And watching Eric man handle a turkey carcass.

Thanksgiving was great and I have way more pictures, but it's already getting late (where the hell does time go these days?!)

Eric is in school all week and my little man will be hanging with me and his Gramma Annie a lot. I actually got some Christmas shopping in today and plan to knock out more as soon as possible. In the meantime, I'll be sending out our holiday cards and marveling at the monster... 

Who clearly enjoys the pack-n-play :)

New Routine?

Holy crap I have a baby.
Like an actual little child that coos and smiles and acts like a child... Not just a blob that I have no idea what to do with! When did this happen?!

I fully believe that my baby is teaching me how to parent him correctly and I just have to be open to his cues. Saturday we had a major break through and he is now sleeping in his crib in the nursery. No more bassinet or cradle in our room... Which he grew out of pretty much over night. I stuck him in the crib for his nap and he slept like a champ. 2 1/2 blissful hours of no baby attached to us made Eric and I feel like actual human beings again, so after texting back and forth with other baby mommas, we decided to just try it for the night. The monster loved it. He was warm and peaceful. He woke up twice to eat/change diapers but had no issue getting back to sleep. And last night he only woke up once! After 9 weeks of just trying to survive, I think our nights are going to be a lot better from now on!
This morning we're just chilling, in fact he's getting quite sleepy as I type this, but I'm awake and somewhat rested. I don't think I would've made it here without my amazing mother-in-law. Almost every morning during the week she has come over to watch Harrison while I slept a few hours to just keep my sanity. She'll be visiting at more normal hours now, which is awesome.

Even with such a great breakthrough, I did have a bit of a melt down this weekend with regards to nursing/formula and I am so thankful to have my cousin Susan only a quick text away. She is a nurse at MUSC and all out baby guru, so when I started freaking out over all the horrendous crap on the internet, she was there to ease my fears. Harrison's growth spurt has caused quite the increase in appetite and I'm just not able to keep up. His pediatrician said that usually my supply will catch up, but if not, it was fine to supplement with formula. I figured a feeding or two would be all, so I was freaking out when he was starving on Saturday and I just had nothing else for him (nor had I had time to do anything since my boob had been in his face the entire damn day already). Well, my friends, when you attempt to find information via Google, you will surely think you are the world's worst mom and your child will grow up fat and stupid and will die of SIDS if you do not constantly breast feed him.
And the texting frenzy began...
Between my mom (who had to switch me to formula at 2 months, so clearly it's not that bad) and Susan (who not only has 2 children of her own but is actually professionally trained), I learned that just because breast milk is best, doesn't mean formula is the devil. And that it's totally normal for this to happen sometimes. Phew.

Still, I have stayed up the past 2 nights with my eyes constantly checking the video monitor... I am officially a nutbag mother.

To end the weekend, Susannah and Trevor came up yesterday for a quick visit. The monster played along quite well and we had a great time as usual. We even got to visit Uncle Nate and taste some of his delicious Aviator beers!

So fingers are crossed for more great nights and less things to freak over. Although I did almost scream at the 2 people who let their dogs run loose while I was walking this morning. I love dogs, but I don't want your sketchy dog coming up to me and my infant. Stranger Danger people. Come on.

My cute baby.

There are OH so many snarky things running through my head that I would really love to say... especially on facebook... But I must refrain. It is difficult to say the least, but I am choosing instead to hang out with my cute baby. I believe this is taking the high road? Maybe not, but I'm really trying here.  I respect that people are so passionate in their beliefs that they choose to put it all out there. The only problem is passion can quickly turn ugly. I think this is why I really don't talk about politics or religion with many people. I certainly try to show my support when I can in a positive way, but it's really hard to respond in a positive way to negative comments, so... I'm glad I have a cute baby that takes up 99% of my time, therefore leaving me with only moments to write this.

I am a liberal democrat and I am not a bad person. That is all I have to say.

Except that I have a really cute baby.

Harrison is now 2 months old and growing like a weed. He's starting to fill out and weighed in at 11lbs, 9oz at his last check up. It's been a few days since he got his first shots (broke my heart) and he's doing great. He holds his head off my shoulder all the time now and is smiling at us quite regularly. I love that he's developing a little personality now but am fearing being with me all the time is going to dramatically sway his demeanor. Hopefully he doesn't pick up all of my sarcastic-ness :)

Eric calming the little monster before the shots

Poor little man...

Mom came up last week to keep us company and help out while Eric took his first trip away. It went as well as it could possibly go. Mom was a huge help and we had a great time hanging out with the little monster for his first Halloween.

Night Owl from Aunt Ashley & Uncle Scott

The Ryan's stopped by to hang out and eat Halloween

Harold must be in as many as many pictures as as possible.

Aunt Skip and Uncle Matt... Phin was not interested in being Thomas the Train

Harold, Monster and Grandpa Brian

We now have an even better sleep situation now too. We are able to put Harrison down around 7-9pm and he sleeps for a solid 4-5 hours, eats, then goes back to sleep for another 3 hours or so. The mornings are still a toss up, but we're all able to sleep in the same room so it can only get better from here.

A little smile :-)

And lastly, I am really looking forward to the holidays this year. I know, I am probably the only person who got excited to see the first Christmas commercial this week.  We're starting a new tradition this year and having Christmas at our house with our little family... I am stoked! I love decorating and am loving the fact that we have a real reason to celebrate something great this year. Christmas will always be bittersweet without my brother Patrick, but I plan to try my hardest to think of the good times and show Harrison a wonderful first Christmas. And we'll be traveling to Charleston for Thanksgiving to show off the cute baby and celebrate the season with my family and friends. I truly cannot wait :)

7 Weeks

And it's looking like a bi-monthly update is what'll happen these days... Not bad since I thought I was going longer. Probably because of how crazy each day/week actually is. Unfortunately I don't really have the time for my usual snarky comments or flowery language, so I hope you all enjoy the pictures instead :)

We are still doing pretty well with our sleep schedule. We tried to switch it up last weekend for a night and holy crap was that horrible. Eric came home on Friday completely exhausted and I wasn't ready for my early bed time. I stayed up until 2am and then woke him up, essentially swapping our "shifts". Big mistake. I was a wreck from being with the baby all day and all night, Eric needed to either stay asleep or just drink 6 cups of coffee to handle the night shift. Saturday was pretty much ruined. We decided to not try that again and the week went a lot better after that.

Here's when I have to look at my calendar to make sure I don't leave anything out...

Sunday kicked off an awesome week. Susannah and Trevor came up for the day to visit. Before heading to our house, Trevor proposed so we had 2 big reasons to celebrate! We had some champagne and cooed over Sus' new rock and our new baby. We got to go to lunch and then visit with Nate and Laura too. Great ending to the weekend.

Sus, her rock and the monster. 

Sus and Laura.

The week then flew by... Harrison had a great time with Annie in the mornings, we ran a few errands and cleaned up a little here and there. I finally got the birth announcements out too.

All bundled up!

Kellie got here Thursday afternoon and had a day to chill with us before my parents got in. We ate leftovers, watched Bravo and hibernated :)

Mom and Dad got in Friday and the weekend went really well. Harrison was fantastic and we had a blast... I got out of the house a bit and Eric grilled out one night. Dad had not seen the baby since the day he was born, so it was great for them to have some bonding time.

So a few kinda milestones happened/are happening now that are really fun. Harrison is starting to track and focus on objects a lot, it's so cool to see him figuring things out. He is growing at lightning speed too. We're finally out of newborn sized clothes and diapers completely and just this morning I noticed the 0-3month onesies are getting a bit tight!

Gigi watched the monster track the birdies :)

We capped off the week by heading to Laura and Nate's yesterday afternoon to celebrate Nate and Matty's birthdays. It was great to catch up with friends and hang out for awhile. Once again we are reminded of how things really change. We were both exhausted by 7pm and had no desire to party... A far cry from days before baby.

And finally, since I know you've all been waiting to hear how my doctor's appointment went...

I did officially switch back to Chapel Hill Ob/Gyn, my original practice, and it could not have gone better. I saw Dr. Hardison, he was nice and professional and made me feel so comfortable! No more mid-wives!!! :-) 

Now on to another fun week. Ashley and Scott are coming on Friday, so we'll be laying low until then!

Life with Monster.

Another 2 weeks have gone by and my child already feels like he's 10 years old sometimes. The little man has grown like a weed and is starting to show some really cool progress in the personality department. He's focusing in on faces and does a little more than the usual eat/sleep/shit rotation... Which is nice.
I also feel like a more normal person these days. Mom visited this past weekend and we took Harrison out to lunch twice and even made it to Target! My confidence was boosted, so now I'm not completely overwhelmed at the thought of taking him places. He pretty much just sleeps anyway.
We changed diapers in public, gave him a bottle, it was all just fine.

This week with the change of weather, we're doing a few exciting things around the house...
Like organizing the bathroom... the linen closet... Changing light bulbs...
Watch out, it's a fun fest here at the Dean's.

We did have a few visitors and continue to have some people stop by to see us and the monster. And Eric and I had a date night on Saturday that started classy with wine at Glass 1/2 Full and ended trashy at the Cellar. Ha! It was a blast though and we were able to see friends, have a few drinks and come home to our little guy.

Now, feast your eyes on a few pictures... And my apologies to my fellow bloggers, I have not been able to catch up on your posts, so expect a rash of comments this week when I finally read everything.

"Mom... Enough with the freaking pictures..."

Aunt Jess came to visit and brought yummy enchiladas :-) I toned down the birthing story and have decided to not scare any of my non-parent friends from now on. 

Sailboat suit on the Sailboat blanket... He couldn't handle the cuteness and promptly peed through everything... 

So now we place him on towels. I have washed our quilt so many times in the past 5 weeks that it's damn near falling apart. I'll pick a more flattering towel next time, but check out the monster's awesome outfit! Sweater from Aunt Max and his first jeans from the Fawcett boys again :-)

Neglect-o mat. 

I hate it, but he loves it. No more grown-up living room... It is now child-infested family room.

Chillin' in Target.

I forget that he's this small... He seems huge to me, but he looks like a tiny man in this one! 

A random thing that has changed.

As I laid my sleeping child down in his bassinet just now, I rushed to the kitchen to see what I could scarf down for lunch and I caught myself...

Not many people know of my complete disdain for leftovers. I have always had a strict "only pizza or spaghetti" leftover policy. I would turn my nose up at anything else in those damn tupperware containers that haunt my refrigerator for days after they were intended to be eaten. Eric loves leftovers... Usually forgets to eat them... But refuses to let me throw out anything for at least 5 days... Sometimes longer. Ugh.
And now... I eat everything.

Our kitchen has been stocked for the past month, thanks to our parents, and I believe I have now eaten leftovers daily.
Leftover italian food? Heat that shit up! Dry day-old mac and cheese? Hell yeah!
I just inhaled cold rotisserie chicken and it was down right delicious.
I don't even recognize myself anymore...

Other than that, my child is growing like crazy. He is figuring out just how much he should eat as well, which has resulted in a spike in spit up and fun diaper changes at 4am. Sleeping is getting better and today while he's napping I will attempt to find more 0-3month outfits in his closet (since he is now 8lbs 9oz... Giant Monster.) and write thank you notes...
And eat more leftovers...

I have a moment so...

Time for some more ramblings!

Being a mom has been getting a bit easier over the past week... Granted it's only been 16 days, but it feels like months. I guess that's what sleep deprivation will do to ya.

Harrison had his 2 week check-up yesterday and I am in love with our pediatrician. He is so relaxed, intelligent and he just makes us feel like we are rocking this parenting stuff. My child is no longer yellow, he's up to 7lbs 8oz and apparently we are doing everything right.

I've had some issues trying to nail down a good nursing routine, so I had tons of questions about feeding times/amounts, etc and was completely reassured that our way is working... Awesome. Quite the change from my interactions with medical staff... Speaking of which, I have my dreaded 2 week check up tomorrow. Thankfully it's with Jenny, the midwife who scheduled the induction, and not either of the 2 women I'm a bit pissed off with. So, she'll be perky and hopefully tell me my insides look great and be happy that I've lost 20lbs in 2 weeks. Yes, 20 freaking pounds. Go me. Too bad that does not get me back into my regular sized pants... Another 10 to go for pre-pregnancy size, then it's time to shed the excess grossness of this stomach. I'm not interested in wearing a bikini or anything, but c'mon. I constantly have to sacrifice my boobs for this little monster, did he have to leave my tummy all squishy and stretch marked?!?

Our new sleep schedule is working out pretty great... I am no longer a zombie, but my bedtime is now 8pm. I sleep until midnight while Eric takes over, then I'm on duty until about 6am. Annie comes over in the mornings so I can get another 2-ish hours, then I'm pretty set for the day. Last night was hard to fall asleep because I feel like I'm really missing out on time with Eric, but sleep is crucial, so we're trying to make the most of the 2.5 hours in between him getting home from work and my modified bedtime.

I had a ton of things I wanted to write about once I had a clear mind, but now it is all escaping me... So, I shall post lots of photos of my sleeping baby... Much more entertaining than my somewhat bitchy updates :)

For Matt Ryan: Eric holding his own baby. 

Eric refused to hold babies that were not his... This isn't the 1st picture/1st time, but I like this one... Harrison looks like a little tree frog on his dad :-)

Not very flattering, but we were both wearing blue... And I am alive, there's your proof.

Awesome Redskins shirt... Way too big, but he'll grow into it. Thanks Aunt Nina & Uncle Pete!

Sleeping monster... 

And as you all know, it's our 2 year anniversary today! We are planning on going out to dinner... Early of course, and without the little man. I was worried I wouldn't be able to part with him, but I think we need at least an hour or two of normalcy outside the house. 

In honor of the milestone, I picked a few pictures from the big day... Always makes me miss Patrick, but helps to remember a wonderful time when everyone was safe and healthy and we were able to party down together.

Our "fake" exit... Didn't want to leave the party, but had to get the picture :-)

9.17.10

Mom and Pat

Marty on the phone from Japan... Only gave me a little shit about getting married ;)

Cutting the cake that had to be moved a thousand times due to heat and poor lighting...

And Patrick again... After we caved and decided to jump on in.

Hey, we had a baby!

So naturally a lot of craziness happened between my last blog post and today...
Mr. Harrison made his debut in a totally unexpected fashion and after a lot of adjustment, I am beginning to feel more normal... Or at least a new version of normal...
This catch up post would be about 10 pages long and take me a week to write if I laid out all of the details, so for now, here is a very shortened timeline. Gory details omitted.

On the 29th, I had my weekly Ob appointment and for the 2nd week in a row my blood pressure was in the scary-high range. When the midwife said we needed to discuss induction, I jumped... nay, leaped, at the offer. She explained the various techniques and scheduled me to be admitted at 8pm the following day.
Well, at 7pm on the 30th she called and said there was no room... She wanted me to come in the next morning instead. I figured that was just one less night in the hospital and the next morning we'd get the show on the road.
I ended up going to the office first to have my insides checked out and my blood pressure was at an all-time high. They admitted me at 10:30am on Friday and started the ridiculously long process at noon.
1st came the Foley Bulb... A fun little contraption used to dilate my cervix to about 4 or 5cm over 8 hours. The contractions got a bit painful and I was given some IV meds, Eric and I watched Law & Order all day.
2nd came the Pitocin. Even more fun. Over night it was supposed to trigger my contractions and get me to dilate to about 8cm. Well, this did not happen. My contractions all but stopped over night and I was stuck at 4cm...
The nurse said we were going to have to explore other options Saturday morning (which included sending me home.) and just as I started to freak out... My water broke.
3rd came the 2nd round of Pitocin... This time it did the trick. And maybe a little too well. The contractions hit me like...well, I don't know like what because I had no clue I could withstand pain like that... And around 9pm I finally got an epidural. Sweet sweet relief...
I was told to get some rest while I dilated the rest of the way. I was finally at 8cm around 3am on Sunday, then a little before 5am I knew it was time. I had made it to push time.

And here's the part we'll have to gloss over...

Let me just say that I now know why no one really talks about the pushing and the pain and the insane emotions that go along with this phase of labor. Even though I had an epidural, the pressure and force used to push was just ridiculous. All of my naive thoughts of a graceful, dignified delivery flew out the window as my amazing husband ended up holding my leg, reminded me to breathe and the nurses counting each push. For 3 and a half hours. Yup.

And then at 8:35am, my little man made his debut. Sunny side up, crying and shaking, I touched his head, they cleaned him up a bit and checked him out since he came out the wrong way, and a few seconds later, he was in my arms. (I'm crying now, so I really don't have any way to describe the feeling... Exhaustion, Relief and Love... So so much love...)

We stayed in the hospital till Monday a noon and then made it home to figure out how to be family.

The past week has been a complete roller coaster. After 3 days in the hospital, I was just destroyed. I cried and cried that I felt like I had no dignity... I cried and cried over the amount of shear shock and awe and love I felt for my husband... And I cried over just about everything else.
My mother-in-law stopped in and I cried to her, my mom came up to help me/us over the weekend and now it's Tuesday... I am no longer crying over everything and the tears that do come are pretty much happy ones.
I miss my brother so much and I can't believe that Eric was there for me like he has been... I mean, the man literally held my leg in the air for 3 and a half hours. I don't think I could've had the strength to do that for someone. And I know no one else would have done that for me.

But we made it.
We have a gorgeous little boy... Our son.
My brother Marty is home for a few weeks and is planning to visit this weekend... Eric is back at work and able to come home early here and there... And I am getting the hang of being a mother. Sleep is a rare commodity, but we're working on that too.
All-in-all, I am in love with my new life, even though it is amazingly hard.
And, yes, I had no clue. No damn clue, but who really does?
Thankfully I have the best support team I could ever dream of.
Oh, and the baby is cute... Thank god I didn't have an ugly baby... :)

Longest month ever.

Yes, the 9th month has officially arrived. Apparently the baby is equivalent to some sort of large melon and may be "dropping" soon. Fingers crossed.

I'm only smiling for the picture.

So last week I attended Knit Night over at Max's house and finally got to catch up with some of my favorite people. Baby Benji is adorable... thank god, it would be hard to lie to Max if she had one of those unfortunate infants, but this kid is something special. His little feature move flawlessly through Max, Matt and his big brother Vince and I found myself just staring down at him and ridiculously smiling at each turn. Not only did I get to lust over the baby, but I was finally in the company of some other mom's and my sister-in-law. I had planned to stay an hour, but ended up staying 2.5 and came home tired, but basically refreshed from some awesome "me" time. Clearly I need to be social, so I will be attending again this week.

Plus... Grammie Q made this amazing sailboat quilt for Baby Dean! How perfect is that?!

Jessica stopped by on Thursday afternoon and that too was good for the soul. We had time to catch up while I stayed in the comfort of my yoga pants and own house. Perfecto. It warms my sappy little prego heart when friends are doing well. My general pessimism is put on hold and I truly sigh a happy sigh to know that those I care about are well, happy!

With 2 social engagements complete, the rest of the week/weekend involved napping, errands and stuff around the house.

Harold likes to wedge himself in my lap and the baby likes to kick him... Entertaining, but also a little distracting when I'm trying to rest.

I washed all of the newborn stuff, so everything smelled delicious like a little baby.

Friday was kind of a crappy day... I went to bed Thursday night out of breath and with a funky stomach. The morning was even worse and it seemed like I was getting dizzy every hour, so I called the midwives to see if I should be concerned. Stephanie (the awesome nurse) said to page on-call because she was a little concerned about the shortness of breath. I talked with Susan (a midwife I actually like) and she was very reassuring. She offered advice over the phone, gave me a few things to look for and said to feel free to come in or call back if needed. I took it easy the rest of the night and Saturday was way better. 

Harold's best sympathy face...

Saturday was spent at Target. Eric and I went to Babies-R-Us too, but Target was the real craziness. I completely forgot about move-in weekend, so I shall wait to return the damn Bumbo seat for a few days. I really thought this weekend would be my last trip, but no... Again...

Afterwards, more nursery organizing, including putting all of those clean clothes away and installing the video monitor. I am fully aware things will never look this organized once the baby is actually here, so photo documentation was necessary. 

Harold did not agree...

And finally Sunday... Rainy day called for changing up the living room. In theory I like this room... it is  huge, filled with cool artwork and has the high ceilings that were so appealing when we bought the house. However I never use this room. So, we decided to mix it up a bit and try a new layout.

Basically swapping the love seat and entertainment center...

We'll see if we like it... Not bad for now...

While Eric moved furniture, I moved books. I didn't want another piece of big wooden furniture in the nursery, so baby books have now joined grown-up books in the living room. At least they are cute.

And that's all for now... Another update in a few days, unless I miraculously go into labor early!!!